Monday, January 23, 2012

Mean Girls.

Source: IMDB

I don't understand why girls are so mean! I have been around long enough to go through a few ordeals and I can only ask, why must girls be so cruel? Does it make them feel better to make someone else sad or hurt? I hated school. I went to more schools than I can count on one hand. I was always the new girl and never really fit in anywhere. Girls were mean to me to the point where I was even in a few physical altercations. Thus, why I had no interest in attending college.

I just remember how nice I tried to be. I tried to make friends with everyone. All I wanted was a friend. Someone to be kind to me.  But the majority of the girls in high school (excluding a few) were just plain ole' mean to me. Ironically, the guys were always nice. I became the kind of girl who stopped caring. I feel for all the girls out there who are treated unkind by "mean girls".

It doesn't stop at high school. I am 27 years old and, still, to this day, I see people my age or older, acting like high school girls. And worse, treating people poorly. There is no reason to be rude to people for no justified reason. I can only come to conclusion that maybe their actions are out of envy. They must be lacking something in their lives if they need to try to make someone else's a hardship. It isn't going to get you anywhere in life to hurt someone else. In fact, it will only bring you down in the end. And on top of that, it only shows how unhappy or insecure or bothered you really are.

I have found the most attractive and beautiful girls, are the ones who are genuinely nice and treat people with kindness. I surround my life with those kind of people. 
(Just a few beautiful girls I know)

Please don't mistake kindness for weakness. Three years ago, if you were cruel to me, or the people that I loved, I would have put you in your place pretty quickly. I can remember numerous times that I did just that for (my then) best friend. Girls were mean to her for some reason. She wasn't the type to stick up for herself. It royally irked me. Watching them treat her badly was like living my experiences all over again. I would snap. I was the one in their face saying things that I am ashamed of now. Things that I won't even write now.

Three years ago, I would have told you where to go and how to get there, not giving it a thought. I did not have the same mentality that I do today. Maybe it's being a mother that has softened my soul. Or maybe it is that I am genuinely happy and I understand that others are not happy with themselves or lives. Therefore, they treat people poorly. Today, I see things so much clearer. I want to be the kind of person that I would want to be friends with. I want to be an example. I know a few girls that I would like to confront and say, "You know what, you are not as perfect as you think, and your actions make you ugly." But in saying that, I would do nothing more than fuel their behavior. I would be no better than them. 

 I want to be a kind, understanding person. I will turn the other cheek, so to speak. That is the way I want to be. I don't want people to think of me and say, "She was the one who always had something nasty to say." or "She is a negative person." I want to spread love and forgiveness. I forgive all those girls who were mean to me. I am nowhere near perfect. I have been guilty of doing or saying cruel things in my past, as well. But I am hopeful that I can keep becoming a better person. 

You won't see me putting others down in a status. 
You won't see me judging people. 
You won't hear me talking badly about my friends. 

We should all evaluate your actions. One sentence can bring so much pain to another. A few words that make you feel superior, can scathe someone else. Next time you have the urge to say something cruel or maybe just to state your opinion, think, 'Would I want someone to say this to or about my daughter or son?' 
If the answer is no, then don't say anything at all. I have found, "the most profound statements are often said in silence".  If there is anything in this world that I do not want to be, it's a mean girl...

Be the person you want to be friends with....


  1. I love this. I also was always the new girl too. We moved about 10 times before I graduated. Not the greatest for making friends. I find that I distance myself from people who talk about others behind their backs. I know they're talking about me the same way. I wish more people had the same thought process as you!

  2. Well said! I have never understood the pettiness and cattiness. I try to surround myself with only positive people and that has resulted in ending a few friendships along the way. But, quality is better than quantity. :)

  3. I know how you feel! Some girls just never grow up! As you get older, some of the girls around you who watch you blossom into a butterfly or succeed in your job or ANYTHING good, get jealous. You would think that as adults, we can learn to be happy with other's successes, but some girls actually stay just the same, picking on other girls, belittling their lives. A girl that I work with actually made me cry the other day! I didn't know it was possible for someone to be so mean to me. I just graduated with a bachelor's of science and opened my own business, but I'm not paying myself right now, trying to put everything back into the business, so I have held onto this waitressing job for some extra cash, and this girl, Megan, loves nothing more than to demean everything I do. She HATES that I'm happily married, she HATES that I graduated college and she HATES that I've opened a business. She makes a point to look for flaws in me everyday. It wears me down mentally. I'm so glad you posted this, because I needed to vent, so thank you. :)

  4. Its funny how it's hard to forget when people are mean to you. Things like that stick with you. I still vividly remember my 8th grade year when I was the new girl in a small school. A handful of girls were so mean to me. I even had a basketball thrown at me. It turns out the ringleader was jealous that her crush liked me. Such pettiness. I mean like I had anything to do with that. Anyways. Thanks for stopping by. I see that our girls are close in age. My daughter was born on May 6th 2011 :)

  5. i love this and think it is so true. i just don't understand how and why some girls can be so mean! i have seen so many girls bully others... for what reason!?!?!? arghhh. anyway, just wanted to let you know how much i agree with and love this post!


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