Copyright © 2013
I sometimes feel like that about my life before I met you.
Those days were hard,
I felt as though I was drunk, spinning around wildly with no intention of stopping. Every turn taking me further away from the light.
Bitter and angry.
Not knowing how I had gotten to that place.
I think I asked God a million times why?
I think I prayed a thousand times for it to go away.
It's a word I use often when I describe that time in my life.
It felt that way.
Like no matter how hard I tried, the water kept hitting my face and pushing me down.
Like I couldn't catch my breath.
Like the more I struggled to reach the top for a breath of air, the faster I sank.
I couldn't hold on, so I began to just...let go....
Free falling down into that murky water.
I watched myself fade...
And just as I felt I was about to hit the bottom, just when I had given up hope, just as I was about to close my heart for good,
two strong arms reached down and pulled me up.
They wrapped around me and held my cold, half-damaged body against theirs.
I opened my eyes,
And there you were.
The answer to my every prayer.
What I had been unknowingly searching for for years.
I know it seems rather dramatic to say that you saved me.
But truly, you saved me.
I find it completely surreal to think that we found each other in this chaotic, mess of a world.
But I know there was help in bringing us together.
With every choice bringing us in a different direction, I realize that all of the bad things that have come my way, no longer matter. Those difficult times swung me around like a rag doll, not caring if I was on my knees already.
Dear Ty, my lover, my rescuer, my heart, my everything.
I want you more than I have ever wanted anything.
The love I feel for you makes my heart beat faster every time I think of our first kiss.
It makes me burn with passion when I think of you telling me you'd wait forever.
It fills my eyes with tears when I think how you unconditionally love me....
This IS the love of a lifetime. I'm so in love still.
The best part is, I know you are here to stay...the day is coming quickly. I'm savoring how I feel in this moment. And yet, I know the best is yet to come.